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When I was growing up, my mother instilled in me and my sisters to be independent, self-reliant, and self-sufficient. To rely on someone else was to give up. As I got older and wiser, I found self-reliance to be limiting and lonely. I knew in my heart there had to be a better way.

I’ve always had a hard time making friends, even as a kid, so the thought of reaching out to others for help or support was, well, terrifying! As I began my writing journey, I found the courage to reach out to other writers and organizations for help. One step at a time, I attended writing conferences, worked on my craft, and met loving and supportive writers. My circle of friends and support was expanding. I began to embrace the idea of not being 100% reliant on myself, which brought me a sense of freedom, and helped me to open my heart.

With continued patience, persistence, and a growing passion for writing, I attended as many conferences as I could. I learned more about writing, myself, and again expanded my circle of love and support in the KidLit world. That’s when I heard about critique groups and trusted my heart. Reading my work for the first time was scary, too! But I reminded myself to be open to feedback and to listen to those seasoned writers who had been there, too. I continued to listen and learn. Over time my writing improved, and I think I actually found my voice along the way.   

From the many critique groups I’ve been a part of, even during the Pandemic, and the conferences where I learned to be a better writer, it’s more about lifelong friendships and the sisterhood you cherish along the way. Every day I reminded myself how much I need other people. As writers and friends, we stick together through all of life’s storms and challenges.

I’m grateful for all the women in my life who have supported and showed me love through the tough times, and the times of joy. Thank you for being there for me and for helping keep my candle lit. We can’t get there alone.

• (Photo by Renata Bowers; my prayer group, yet another tribe of supportive, kind, loving women)